I’m an INTJ woman, who is also Highly Sensitive (HSP). I was tested as an INTJ at the university careers centre, but only really started to understand what it meant 15 years ago; while 5 years ago I was told I was an HSP by my counsellor who also happens to be an HSP expert. I was in no doubt that I was both of these things, but they aren’t exactly natural bedfellows. INTJs have a reputation for being unfeeling robots, with no social skills, who are a combination of Sheldon and Dr House (we aren’t but more about that later)/ While Google HSP and you see people talking about being empaths, psychic abilities, horoscopes, crystals, and illustrated with photos of someone on their own, looking wan and pained (and not all of us are like that either).
See, there is a lot of grey area about being both an INTJ and HSP, and even with all the help of someone who knows far more than I ever could about being an HSP, I still had problems getting to grips with what it means to be sensitive. The more information I tried to find outside of my counselling sessions, the less it sounded like me. The amount of disinformation about being an HSP is suffocating any real meaning of what the term means, and when it is discussed, the loudest voices are of those who only represent a small section of the HSP community. I know that if I went by what I read on the internet, I would have dismissed any idea of being sensitive and missed out on unravelling a key part of my life – and I know I am not on my own.
So I am going to do my best to ask some questions, shed some light on and dispel some myths, while sharing some of my understanding of what it means to be a thinking HSP.
fairymeisie said:
I’ve often thought I was a little psychic and could predict thing, but I’m not, lol, nowhere near it infact.
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Gandalf said:
I just found your blog by googling for “highly sensitive intj”. You may now guess that we have something in common 🙂 Well, ok, I am a man, but I am not sure how significant that is. Anyway, I am very eagerly waiting for more posts from you 🙂
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Nicola said:
Hi,
Thanks for dropping by 🙂 Being an HSP can impact on people in different ways, although it can be tricky being a man with society’s expectations on what it is to be male etc. Ted Zeff has some great information for men.
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Mandy said:
Being an INTJ already comes with so many contradictions and being a highly sensitive INTJ sometimes feels like nonsense. I am finally getting to the point of trying to balance both of these aspects of my personality. So glad to learn that I am not alone.
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Nicola said:
Glad to know another HSP, INTJ – I hope that my posts will help 🙂
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Just another visitor said:
Read through your posts up until now. Good read, it is nice to find some comments on HSP without the fluffy, spiritual side. Not that I dismiss it, I just cant specifically realate to it.
And you are right about it dwindling down to “yeah this is totally HSP!”, really takes the edge off the discussion for me.
I tested as INTP and INTJ a few years back, but couldn’t really put my finger on why I didn’t “fit” with the others. I don’t really care much for labels, but with HSP I can sort of understand why that is, and why my previous years were so totally overwhelming to the point of apathy.
Good work with the blog, hope you are having fun!
Btw, totally off-topic:
I have this need to share ideas and thoughts about, you know, “deep stuff” as its often called. Conciousness, existence, meaning of life (though I don’t really like the expression), and I find it tremendously hard to find ANYONE willing to discuss (or that can discuss?) this in a manner which I would like (just exploring the potentials of consiousness and what our limits are). Anyway, I wonder if you can relate to this and if so if you have found some outlet or some way to sneak if into a conversation :).
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Nicola said:
Thank you! That’s very kind of you 🙂
Yes, I know what you mean, I thankfully have some great forums on Facebook as an outlet for the ‘deep stuff’. It’s nice when you find kindred spirits, you are certainly not alone!
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